I got up this morning with intention of checking the weather report prior to popping into the shower. Our room felt a bit warm and I wanted to know if it was weather related or inferno within me related. Sat down at the computer, as usual, but this time the familiar pictures captured my 6am mind. I watched the honeymoon pictures interlocked with seasonal pictures, wedding pictures, California pictures, Cheddar pictures, and so many more memories. And a flood of joy filled me.
A few weeks ago Matt and I were out on a semi-routine walk. I was feeling whale-like and inactive, Matt finding joy in the joy I received from the walk (AKA he did not want to go, but went because it made me happy and therefore was happy because I was happy). We walked along sharing the day with each other and enjoying the random silences that we also shared with each other. Then Matt piped in, “So I’ve been thinking and I’d like for us to plan to go out to California. I want to meet your grandma and see the beach, and the church, and the places I’ve seen in the photos.” Could he have said ‘I love you’ any stronger? His heart just poured out in a few thoughtful sentences. And I must confess, that really meant the world to me that he wanted to meet my family more. “We’ll have to check where we are financially,” he went on “but I’m thinking if we plan far enough out then we could bring the baby to go meet your Grandma.”
Those words flew through my thoughts as I watched how far God has taken us. I was reminded of being nearly engaged to Matt during the last California trip. And the joy on our faces during the outside pictures after our ‘I do’s. We had no idea what we were getting into, and we still don’t, but I’ve never been more sure of forever in my best friend’s arms.
I can easily fall into a pattern of complaining and focusing on how much plans are not what I had imagined since I was a child regarding being a stay-at-home-mom instantly and all the other naive imaginings that will drift away as reality is born. And it’s in those complaining and incontent times that I really need someone to holler, “Are you serious?! Look what you have!!!”
Selfishness is such an easy trend. “I want it all, I want it all, I want it all and I want it now,” familiar commercial jingles about electronics and food come to mind. But God just caught me this morning before starting the normal routine of, “so this is life,” and reminded me of the blessing.
I have never felt such joy in life as I feel today. Each day that passes is a new day to be married to my best friend. And I can honestly say that I love him more today than on our wedding day. I mean seriously, who else is going to be there to sing Celine Dion songs in the car like Jr. High protegees at the top of our lungs because we are both comfortable enough with each other that we can be silly in front of each other? Who else can help set me straight when I’m way out in left field? Who else pursues me because he wants to know me more? Who else is there to make royal mistakes with, cry with and then later laugh about the mistakes with? No, my sweet friends, Matt is not perfect – and neither am I. But I really can’t put into words the absolute joy of being married to your best friend – morning breath and all. I am overjoyed with all that God has brought us – even the trials – and can’t wait for the joys that God will bestow upon us in the future.
A co-worker asked me last week if Matt was my first love. “You know, I guess he is because he really defines love in the most real way I have ever experienced. I honestly can’t say I experienced the depth of a true love prior to him.” And the only way he can do so much and be so much to me is because of how hard he tries to be like Jesus. Because I know that Matt does not complete me, he’s no where even close. But Jesus completes me and it’s Christ in him that floors me as well. Matt compliments me far greater than anyone will even compliment me – after all one we have become and no man can separate that. Oh but you should see that man on fire for Jesus. Who could not want to be married to him?
-No wonder I’m head over heels for him. –